Comments on: when words fail: quality of life at the end of life

By: kye

kye — Mon, 03 May 2010 21:31:32 +0000

Madeleine, yes, really important in a hospital–and even more important in long term care situations. So little of the process of dying actually usually happens in hospitals now–insurance companies see to it that the patient is discharged as soon as humanly possible. They are often sent to rehab facilities or other nursing homes because the level of care still needed is way beyond the capacities of most families. I've found that this is a much more difficult environment to negotiate. In some ways it's better than a hospital, in other ways not.

It is a disturbing subject, sometimes I wonder if it's more than people who read this blog would really want to bite off. My hope is that it may also give a sense of relief to some people at least, a feeling of being a little more oriented in a situation that can be very hard to understand, especially at first.

By: Madeleine

Madeleine — Sun, 02 May 2010 01:22:08 +0000

Kye, This is fascinating in a disturbing way. I have read 3 or 4 books by doctors who emphsize how important it is to keep watch when a loved one is in the hospital. So many people are involved in the care, and often coordination is not so good. It's wonderful that you were able to sit quietly and look for clues and even more wonderful that by doing this you learned what you needed to know. Your mother is fortunate to have a daughter like you.

I think this post will help many others struggling with end-of-life care for a parent.

By: kye

kye — Thu, 29 Apr 2010 06:54:25 +0000

Sandy, thanks. I do hope that it might help someone else at some point.

And, I'll write more about how I keep the hurting one company–thanks for the invitation!

By: Sandy_Powers

Sandy_Powers — Tue, 27 Apr 2010 11:15:42 +0000

Kye, thank you for sharing this. I went thru a very similar journey in saying good-bye to my own mom who had alzheimers a few years ago. I had a co-worker who had been through it with her mom, and her experience and counsel helped me so much as I went thru it. I know that there are also others who will find comfort in your journey and the eloquent way you share it. I will keep you and your mom in my prayers.

And p.s. I do look forward to hearing more about how you "keep the hurting one reassuring company while you go about your day" That tapped into something that I know will be an excellent read for me!